2025 12 27

Don’t Fret’s Art. Chicago, Illinois. February, 2025. © Clayton Hauck

Not Becoming a Documentary Filmmaker in 2026
For last year’s post about becoming a documentary photographer this year, please see: 2024 12 27

This year was supposed to be my Big Pivot back to video. Filmmaking was my first love in this creative field and it’s what got me my start as a photographer. I studied film in college and had big visions of becoming the next Paul Thomas Anderson by now. Having just checked out Marty Supreme, Josh Safdie’s latest film, regrets about my lack of persistence in the medium persist. Josh and I are roughly the same age and while I’m not quite disillusioned enough to think I could be directing feature films on his level at this point in my life, I am fairly confident I could’ve had a respectable career doing something in pictures.

The real reason for my lack of pivoting to motion mostly comes down to an active choice against doing so. Continually, I find more love for the still image and enjoyment in capturing photos. There are folders filled with video files sitting on my computer that I have hardly looked at since shooting them. Namely: Illinois Wandering videos I’d planned to cut into a youtube video; night’s out at various bars I’d planned to make into a Chicago cocktail tour; multiple sessions of filming with the late artist Don’t Fret.

This is a tough one to write, as I’ve still not fully come to comprehend or digest the passing of my pal Cooper. Realistically, I am mentally avoiding the topic to a large degree to protect myself. Maybe that’s selfish; maybe my reluctance to avoid motion work is selfish. I don’t really know, but I will tell you that the biggest reason for my shunning of video this year was Cooper’s death. We had been in the early phases of making a documentary about his life when he suddenly passed away. What I took from my friend, in the end, was a more clear understanding that I should be making work that speaks to me and not be afraid to put it out into the world. In many ways, I now feel as though I’m becoming my own version of Don’t Fret, who oftentimes people would mistake me for as we had a similar look about us… and now, a bit of his hard-nosed will to make art has seeped into my pores and guided me into unknown territory I am still learning to navigate.

We’ll leave it there, for now, however I am long overdue a post dedicated to my friend. The photozine I put out this year was dedicated to him and I’m now working on zine number two (both non-video projects!), which will also feature Don’t Fret vibes. Seeing as this post was less of a New Year’s Resolution and more of a follow-up to a previous resolution, I guess I am also due for a new topic to work on next year. For now, I’m more content watching the next A24 film than I am attempting to make it myself.

-Clayton

This is one entry in a multi-part series of self-exploration and contemplation-out-loud in advance of the new calendar year. Some of this may happen; none of this may happen.
For the complete list of Year-End Resolution posts from this year, please see: tbd
For the complete list of Year-End Resolution posts from last year, please see: 2024 12 25.