2025 12 27

Don’t Fret’s Art. Chicago, Illinois. February, 2025. © Clayton Hauck

Not Becoming a Documentary Filmmaker in 2026
For last year’s post about becoming a documentary photographer this year, please see: 2024 12 27

This year was supposed to be my Big Pivot back to video. Filmmaking was my first love in this creative field and it’s what got me my start as a photographer. I studied film in college and had big visions of becoming the next Paul Thomas Anderson by now. Having just checked out Marty Supreme, Josh Safdie’s latest film, regrets about my lack of persistence in the medium persist. Josh and I are roughly the same age and while I’m not quite disillusioned enough to think I could be directing feature films on his level at this point in my life, I am fairly confident I could’ve had a respectable career doing something in pictures.

The real reason for my lack of pivoting to motion mostly comes down to an active choice against doing so. Continually, I find more love for the still image and enjoyment in capturing photos. There are folders filled with video files sitting on my computer that I have hardly looked at since shooting them. Namely: Illinois Wandering videos I’d planned to cut into a youtube video; night’s out at various bars I’d planned to make into a Chicago cocktail tour; multiple sessions of filming with the late artist Don’t Fret.

This is a tough one to write, as I’ve still not fully come to comprehend or digest the passing of my pal Cooper. Realistically, I am mentally avoiding the topic to a large degree to protect myself. Maybe that’s selfish; maybe my reluctance to avoid motion work is selfish. I don’t really know, but I will tell you that the biggest reason for my shunning of video this year was Cooper’s death. We had been in the early phases of making a documentary about his life when he suddenly passed away. What I took from my friend, in the end, was a more clear understanding that I should be making work that speaks to me and not be afraid to put it out into the world. In many ways, I now feel as though I’m becoming my own version of Don’t Fret, who oftentimes people would mistake me for as we had a similar look about us… and now, a bit of his hard-nosed will to make art has seeped into my pores and guided me into unknown territory I am still learning to navigate.

We’ll leave it there, for now, however I am long overdue a post dedicated to my friend. The photozine I put out this year was dedicated to him and I’m now working on zine number two (both non-video projects!), which will also feature Don’t Fret vibes. Seeing as this post was less of a New Year’s Resolution and more of a follow-up to a previous resolution, I guess I am also due for a new topic to work on next year. For now, I’m more content watching the next A24 film than I am attempting to make it myself.

-Clayton

This is one entry in a multi-part series of self-exploration and contemplation-out-loud in advance of the new calendar year. Some of this may happen; none of this may happen.
For the complete list of Year-End Contemplation posts from 2025, please see: 2025 12 25.
For the complete list of Year-End Contemplation posts from 2024, please see: 2024 12 25.

2025 09 08

Dave sports Don’t Fret. Chicago, Illinois. June, 2025. © Clayton Hauck

-Clayton

2025 09 02

RIP Don’t Fret. Chicago, Illinois. July, 2025. © Clayton Hauck

Have I mentioned I run a photobook shop now? www.realmbooks.co

I’m busy adding a dozen or more new titles to the website over the next few days. Check it out, and buy a book maybe?! All the money we make on books, for the foreseeable future, goes to purchasing more books. It’s just smart business. See you on Shark Tank!

-Clayton

2025 08 14

You said it, man. Chicago, Illinois. May, 2025. © Clayton Hauck

This tag spoke to me, as I passed by in a hurry to get to one of my various side hustle jobs. I’m clearly doing too much. Spreading myself too thin. Whether this is the right decision or not, I don’t yet know, but it feels quite necessary if I want to stick with photography as my job (as I do).

This also reminded me of my friend, Don’t Fret. He unexpectedly passed away earlier this year and I don’t think I’ve fully comprehended the fact that he’s no longer here. Often, we focus far too much on moving, moving, moving. And not enough on Being Present, as he would advise through his art.

I worked long hours Monday thru Thursday this week. While stopping one morning to grab a coffee and breakfast sandwich at a Starbucks, before most other coffee shops were open, the scene was stark: The pickup counter was full of caffeinated beverages waiting to be picked up. I ordered at the counter, and while I waited for my cold brew, I watched an endless flow of human drones with sleep in their eyes walk in, grab their order, and head off into the workday.

Reminder: it is important to be present

-Clayton

2025 06 01

Don’t Fret art. Chicago, Illinois. February, 2025. © Clayton Hauck

While Don’t Fret is no longer with us, he will live on, through his art and through his spirit, for some time.

We were in early production on a documentary about his life. While this project has been derailed, it will eventually be turned into something worthwhile. More on this another day. More on all of this, in fact, another day, as I surely have quite a lot more thoughts to share once I both find the time to share them and fully process the realities.

Until then, don’t fret.

-Clayton

PS- thank you to all who attended and helped plan the lovely memorial service

2025 04 18

Note from a vaguely anonymous artist. Dont Fret. Home Away From Home, Chicago, Illinois. February, 2025. © Clayton Hauck

We lost a real one today. More thoughts another day, as I have yet to fully process the stark reality.

Today, we fret.

-Clayton